Tuesday, May 21, 2013

2013 NBA Draft Lottery insta-analysis

By The 21st Century Media Alliance

Here are some notes from a chat involving various Media Alliance members for the NBA Draft Lottery.  Participants include FDH Senior Editor Jason Jones, FDH Managing Partner Rick Morris, DOU Productions proprietor Platinum Smalls, FDH Lounge Dignitaries Chris Galloway and Paul Pasek and Ben Chew of That NBA Lottery Pick and Outside the Boxscore.

Paul: What’s not to like?
Raymond: Many of the opinions of this crew, but that's for another time.
Ben: Almost time.
Rick: More punchable face: Jay Bilas, Screamin' A or Pete Campbell from Mad Men. I'd cheat and ask for three fists if asked my preference.
Rick:  Wow, a shot of Lionel Hollins on-screen and you can barely see "Pop's Bitch" tattooed on his head from Sunday. Modern soap works marvels.
Ben: Geez, Rick
Rick: Too much venom too soon, BC?
Ben: Never too soon.
Rick: Bryan Colangelo is still allowed to rep the Raptors? By that logic, SVG should be up there for Orlando.
Ben: Dan Gilbert stole his suit from the 99 cent store.
Rick: Can we please get an MC less professionally perky and pleasant than Heather Cox? Not a huge Rosanne Barr fan, but this schtick is enough to make me wish for the exact other end of the spectrum.
Jason: Sorry I'm late. Just a thought. For the 7th time this week I heard some idiot say Noel IS the #1 pick in the upcoming draft. Why? Because he has a wingspan? Because he's every bit the player Anthony Davis is if you subtract 90% of Anthony Davis' offensive game? He looks like Tyrus Thomas.
Rick: Dan Gilbert is stylin' as always!
Rick: Utah is 14. Sorry, Mormons!
Rick: Dallas is 13. No help for Dirk!
Jason: Isn’t that something from Al's down on Prospect and 9th?
Rick: Toronto is 12. Even without Colangelo, good things still won't happen!
Rick: Philly is 11. Sorry!
Rick: Portland is 10 and Ben is pissed.
Rick: Minnesota is 9. KLove is outta there!
Rick: Detroit is 8. Dumars will still screw it up!
Ben: Wiz Kids move up.
Rick: Sactown is 7. They still don't deserve their team!
Rick: Wiz in the Top 3, sure.
Rick: New Orleans is 6. No Noel with ADavis!
Jason: This is where I get nervous.
Rick: Phoenix is 5 and will still be garbage.
Ben: Cleveland, Orlando, and wizards are your Top 3.
Rick: Charlotte is 4 and the good Cavs fans among us are going to be left to sweat through one of ESPN's obnoxiously-placed commercial breaks.
Jason: #1 to trade or #2 to pick, anything but 3 at this point.
Rick: I would hold hands walking down the street with the idea of Otto Porter at 3 for the Cavs.
Jason: C'mon Rick, who doesn't love oversized M&M's singing Meatloaf's "I would do anything for love" while trying to escape certain peril...
Rick: True, I won't shart on any commercials featuring Meatloaf.
Jason: C'mon, not #2!
Rick: Washington is 3! Sorry, Beal!!!
Rick: Orlando is 2 and The Good Luck Kid Nick Gilbert brings home #1 for the Good Guys!
Ben: Cleveland wins again...in the worst draft.
Jason C. Jones Hell...yeah...bitches! #1 again.
Rick: Too bad there is no #1 pick in this draft, correct, Ben.
Rick: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let Minnesota be interested in this for a KLove package!!!
Rick: Brad Daugherty, LeBron James and Kyrie Irving ... not too many franchises go 3-for-3 even with the top overall pick. Michael Olowokandi, anyone?
Jason: Trade that pick. C'mon down, Kevin Love, you're the next contestant on "who gets to help Kyrie?"
Ben: Dan Gilbert's secret deal with David Stern is completed.
Rick: The #1, Tristan Thompson, Sideshow Bob Varejao and another #1 for KLove. Make it happen, Cap'n!
Jason: OK ESPN, quit this bull$h!t about Noels playing next to Tristan and Andy.
Jason: OK, now Jay Bilas...shut up.
Rick: This night won't be complete until Nick Gilbert punches Jay Bilas in the nuts on the way out of the studio.
Rick: Yeah, Jason, Noel playing NEXT to Tristan and Andy? Even if they keep the pick, Tristan can't play too many minutes at the 3.
Paul: One to the nuts for Jay. lol
Rick: Who's up for keeping the chat going during the Turner Classic Movies showing of Petrified Forest at 9:30 PM EDT? LOLZ
Christopher: If they keep it, I'm more interested in what they do with the second pick.
Paul: Cavs have the 1, 19, 31, and 33rd picks this year. Interesting to see what happens.

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