Saturday, August 29, 2009

Googling Atlee Hammaker: The Bretts (Favre/Hart)

By Rick Morris

Courtesy of our new fellow member of The 21st Century Media Alliance, we bring you an awesome transcript between two hugely self-impressed folks who share a first name.

The Two Bret(t)s
By Platinum Smalls

Brett Favre is an egotistical, self-important overvalued former cornerstone. Bret Hart is an egotistical, self-important overvalued former cornerstone. Two smugger athletes are non-existent, as evidenced by the pair’s recent conversation…

Brett Favre: The Minnesota Vikings called me.
Bret Hart: Curt Henning is from Minnesota and I beat him at Summer Slam ’91.
Brett Favre: The Atlanta Falcons drafted me in 1991.
Bret Hart: Atlanta and Chattanooga are 104 miles apart and I won my fourth championship in Chattanooga.
Brett Favre: I had consecutive four touchdown games in 2003.
Bret Hart: Jim Neidhart and I won consecutive matches at Wrestlemania V & VI.
Brett Favre: I’ve been a five time NFC Player of the Year
Bret Hart: I was a five time WWF Champion.
Brett Favre: I threw five touchdowns against the Vikings in 1997.
Bret Hart: I won the championship twice in 1997.
Brett Favre: I won the Super Bowl in 1997.
Bret Hart: I defeated Steve Austin, the Undertaker, and Vader in one match in 1997.
Brett Favre: Steve Austin and the Undertaker are from Texas, where I’ve beaten Houston twice.
Bret Hart: I beat Skinner at Tuesday in Texas in 1991.
Brett Favre: I threw four passes in 1991.
Bret Hart: I’ve won four United States Heavyweight titles.
Brett Favre: I had four three touchdown plus games in 2004.
Bret Hart: I had four consecutive wins at Summerslam from 1993-1997.
Brett Favre: I threw 19 touchdown passes in 1993.
Bret Hart: I won Feud of the Year with Jerry Lawler in 1993.
Brett Favre: Jerry Lawler is from Memphis, who we beat in 1990.
Bret Hart: Jim Neidhart and I won a match in nineteen seconds in 1990.
Brett Favre: My two touchdown passes won a game 19-13.
Bret Hart: I beat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania 13.
Brett Favre: I had thirteen completions in a win against Tampa Bay.
Bret Hart: I’ve won thirteen singles titles.
Brett Favre: I had thirteen rushing touchdowns as a Packer.
Bret Hart: I won my first WWF title in Saskatoon, which is 1,217 miles from Green Bay.

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