By Rick Morris
While the Seth
Rollins injury supposedly didn’t shake up the top of the card at WrestleMania
32 – which should be the biggest in history by one very important metric, a
live crowd which should top 100K for the first time – it should have. The thought of him not being in a top match
after being on top most of the year – albeit, yes, with the same “Honkytonk Man
chicken-s” booking that also did Miz no favors back in 2010-11 – and not being
used at ‘Mania in a top spot seems a terrible waste.
Thus, let’s lead off with the matches
that I wanted to see on top before his injury:
MAIN EVENT
Dean Ambrose (WWE World Champion) vs.
Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins vs. Brock Lesnar
In essence, it’s
Brock vs. all of the members of the Shield, with Dean as the champ joining last
year’s main event. How do you get
here? Relatively simply. Roman takes the title from Seth, as would
have apparently happened anyway, but gets immediately jumped by the Wyatts
again. Oh, by the way, Dean would have beaten
Sheamus for the briefcase prior to this.
He runs in ostensibly to save Roman, but instead he joins the attack,
joins the Wyatt family, actually, and cashes in. Roman wins the Rumble again to get his
rematch, but Seth and Brock make successful appeals to HHH to join the
match. Dean and Bray together leading
into ‘Mania would be the kind of Roddy Piper/Jake Roberts heel pairing on top
that we never got back in 1986. Roman
takes the title, pinning Ambrose and leaving open rematches with all three men.
SEMI-MAIN-EVENT
John Cena vs. The Undertaker
This is a
pretty straightforward respect match. It’s
arguable that Cena needs the win less than ‘Taker if there’s 1-2 more ‘Mania
matches left for the Dead Man – as seems to be the case – and nobody’s ever
lost luster by losing to Undertaker at WrestleMania, so that probably dictates
the booking.
OK, with those might-have-beens
out of the way, let’s revisit the usual ground rules in this space for fantasy
booking. All of this has to be within
the parameters of the possible, so John Cena jobbing clean to Cesaro in 30
seconds – while I, as a bona fide smart mark, would pay big money to see that –
and other such ridiculous scenarios are off the board. For example, Roman Reigns is going over for
the World Title no matter what, so I’m not fighting the impossible battle,
merely trying to show how it could best be done – and that’s the same approach
for the booking up and down the card.
MAIN EVENT
John Cena (WWE World Champion) vs. Brock
Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns
Vince McMahon
is reputed to be torn between Cena and Lesnar as dance partners for his new
lead star. Why not both? On a card that’s going to be apparently deprived
of some of the old-school name value that we thought maybe we’d see (The Rock)
or saw last year (Sting), why not load up a main event that would be one of the
most star-studded three-ways in history?
Here’s how you get there. Reigns
does win the tournament at Survivor Series this Sunday, but Sheamus immediately
cashes in on him due to an attack from Wade Barrett. While Reigns is pursuing revenge against
Barrett, Sheamus quickly loses the title to Cena. Reigns wins the Royal Rumble again, while
Paul Heyman successfully petitions to have Lesnar added to the match since he
never was pinned for the title and had his rematch disrupted by The Undertaker. Here’s the finish, setting up rematches for
Reigns against both men: with Roman outside the ring, Cena has Lesnar locked in
the STF when Heyman interferes. Cena
grabs Heyman, while Lesnar delivers an F5, only to be met with a spear from
Reigns as he hoists himself up to crawl over to make the pin. Reigns steals the pin on Cena and gets his
moment to celebrate at the end of the night.
SEMI-MAIN-EVENT #1
HHH vs. Dean Ambrose – TEXAS DEATH MATCH
This card needs
to be about cementing the stars of the next generation – in an aspirational
sense, like WrestleMania 14 with Austin, The Rock, the New Age Outlaws, HHH,
Mankind and Kane. As such, that has to
determine the booking and placement of the existing top guys. This match is a no-brainer: the figurehead of
The Authority vs. the biggest anti-authority (and anti-Authority) guy on the
roster. Position Ambrose as the initial
challenger to Sheamus during his brief spell with the WWE World Title and
position HHH as the man who, horrified at the thought of Ambrose as “face of
the company,” redoubles his efforts to keep him away from the belt. This can easily build towards the kind of
all-out brawl that could steal the show.
Here, HHH has the chance to pay it forward in giving the final push
towards superstardom that Mick Foley bequeathed to him 16 years ago.
SEMI-MAIN-EVENT #2
The Undertaker vs. Daniel Bryan
With Bray Wyatt
super-unlikely to be a ‘Taker foe two years in a row at WrestleMania, just
about any hate-filled-feud angle is out the window, so we’re back to the
concept of a respect match. This would
be a perfect one, since Bryan is reputed to be on the verge of being cleared:
Undertaker could do a lot to put him over simply by issuing the challenge,
noting that the Bearded One has become one of the very best in the world and
somebody who could challenge him sternly on the grandest stage. As with Cena, it would make more sense to
have Undertaker go over, especially since it could kick off a “re-proving
himself” angle for Bryan after being out of action for the vast majority of the
last two years.
Paige (WWE Divas Champion) vs. Charlotte
vs. Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks vs. Naomi vs. Brie Bella
Brie gets into
this match simply because it can’t be presumed that Nikki will be cleared by
then and, storyline-wise, with the Bellas as the top figures pre-“Revolution,”
one of them does belong in this match.
This would be a perfect place for Sasha to take the title for the first
time and cement her face turn in the process, leaving Naomi and BAD
behind. It remains to be seen how nasty
the WWE will let Sasha be as a face, since the last thing you’d want to do is
take away her personality even if the crowd is forcing her to become a “good
guy,” but that concern can’t affect the outcome here.
Kevin Owens (Intercontinental Champion)
vs. Cesaro
Ideally,
neither man would take a loss on this card, but there’s only so many wins to go
around and a 4 ½-star epic would at least somewhat elevate both. KO won at Summerslam and Cesaro is more in
need of a boost right now, so he would go over here in a moment that,
ironically, will mean much more than it should given how stingy the WWE has
been with allowing him the successes he deserves after winning the Andre battle
royal two years ago.
New Day (WWE World Tag Team Champions)
vs. Dolph Ziggler & Ryback
The top of the
face ladder is pretty crowded and the company is reluctant to give Dolph the “all
the way” push, so this is a good spot for a heel turn, maybe reprising the Strike
Force breakup of 1989. This outcome
keeps New Day on top of the tag division even longer – keeping in mind that,
with the epic stretch that they’ve had, like The Shield, they’re going to need
at least a brief face run on top before they split up – without costing the
now-feuding Ziggler and Ryback any heat in the process.
The Dudley Boys vs. Wade Barrett &
Sheamus
Honestly, you
could whip up any kind of a pretext angle to put these four men in the ring in
Arlington. This match would deliver the
nostalgia pop that fans enjoy on this stage, whilst putting over Barrett and
Sheamus – who, hopefully, have something left to offer.
Tyler Breeze vs. Neville
The setup here
is simple: Breeze, having never been able to beat Neville for the NXT Title and
having had to wait eight months longer for the call-up because of that failure,
seeks the chance to make things right at WrestleMania. He goes over, but, in having put over Neville’s
dominant NXT streak (which, sadly, hasn’t been mentioned nearly enough on
commentary since he joined the main roster), he keeps his British rival strong
for rematches.
Alberto Del Rio (US Champion) vs.
Kalisto
Granted, their
World Title tournament match was a debacle, but a matchup of top Latin stars
has been a tried-and-true staple for putting backsides in seats in Texas for
decades. Plus, the WWE is reputed to always
be angling for a chance to get the world record for masks being worn in a
venue, and featuring Kalisto in a match would fit the bill. This should be a hot opener, with ADR
blatantly cheating to go over. Then, the
next night on Raw, he can mock the old “US Open challenges,” only to be
shockingly answered by Cena coming out to accept and win back the US Title.
(Pre-Show) Andre the Giant Memorial
Battle Royal
The storyline
going in is “4 vs. 26,” as the Wyatt Family has vowed to come away with the big
win. The assumption is that Braun
Stroman would be the man to emerge, if they could pull it off, but Luke Harper,
as the best worker by far in the Family, could do more with the rub. Stroman could go out as part of a big tumble
over the top also involving Big Show and Kane.
Harper and Stroman could both come out of this match as viable
contenders for Reigns in his first year on top.
No comments:
Post a Comment