Friday, May 9, 2014

2014 NFL Draft First Round liveblog



By Rick Morris



A number of FDH Lounge Dignitaries and other 21st Century Media Alliance talents participated in this liveblog, including myself, Jason Jones, Chris Galloway, Paul Pasek, Kyle Ross, The Scout Ken Becks, Don Peterson, Raymond Smalley, Jeff Briscoe, Anthony Petrone, Bob Glassman, Mike Ptak and Scott Pullins.



Paul

Let's draft baby!!!!!!!!!



Kyle

This is Kyle Ross. Reporting live from Bristol!



Paul

Where's Frank Caliendo? lol



Ken

Who’s the first QB off the board tonight?



Raymond

Given your habit of puckering up your lips and smooching the rear end of Sidney Crosby, I am sure I join Rick Morris in wishing that you were, as Dan Rather once eloquently opined, reporting live from somewhere in captivity. #ItsOnBiatches



Rick

First one, Scout? Gotta guess Johnny Football, although there's probably at least a 1-in-4 chance it's Bortles.



Ken

Agree. This has to be one of the worst QB crops to anticipate where they’re selected in years!



Raymond

One in four chance with four quarterbacks being mentioned as potential first round choices... Ladies and Gentleman that's why Rick Morris gets all of the great...... cough... some of the marginal women.



Rick

No, a 1-in-4 chance it's not Manziel. #ReadingComprehensionIsYourFriend



Ken

Ha Raymond what’s going on!



Don

Are we ready. guys?

1 min · Like



Ken

Geez, gotta hurry up and take my pre-draft shower. Be back



Rick

Our nostrils thank you, Ken.



Paul

Smell-O-Computer!



Raymond

Ewwwwwwww I knew it would get weird tonight but I thought that would involve Ben Chew!



Rick

Ah, I'm cool with Aloe Blacc as much as the next average white guy, but they're already turning this draft into the equivalent of what the NBA Draft did in 2011 with Adele. #Overkill



Raymond

(A) Thankful I don’t have television coverage of this draft in the studio... (B) Dont kid yourself, Rick... When you are on stage for one of our scripted projects, you will demand Aloe Blacc be played as your entrance theme bahahahaha



Raymond

Tension mounts.... Oh what a feeling.

Rick: Here is Jason’s final mock draft:




Paul

How hard is it to write down Clowney? lol



Rick

They're milking the clock to intimidate everyone else!



Kyle

I'll be checking back before the Browns pick......



Rick

What's the over-under on East 55th and Scoville jokes if the Browns somehow end up with Mack?



Don

Goodell told them to use the full 10.



Paul

Lol Don.



Raymond

Ironic that you mention that, Rick, I was just there this afternoon... I'd share what I brought home but I bought enough to write the next two scenes bahahaha.



Raymond

Jadeveon Clowney is the second South Carolina Gamecock to be selected number one overall and the highest defensive player selected in the university's history. The previous highest were a pair of cornerbacks, Stephon Gilmore in 2012 and Dunta Robinson in 2004.



Rick

Smalls may not have TV, but he clearly has Wikipedia!



Raymond

C'mon Rick.... This and talking about the entire series of The OC are the only opportunities I have to sound intelligent (most of that is from Wikipedia also)....



Don

Hey guys I need a mute Mel Kiper button on my phone. Is there an app for that??



Rick

More Jason Jones, less Mel Kiper on my TV.



Raymond

Don as you may not know but Rick could tell you you can switch away from the Running Commentary Douche by clicking the RCD button on your remote control #OnlyTwoPeopleGetThatJokeandWeAreBothLaughingHysterically



Kyle

Kiper actually is making the most sense at the espn desk!



Chris

Am I the only one watching on NFL Network?



Rick

That's the Taller Than Mickey Rooney Award, Kyle.



Rick

Yes, I don't have it.



Raymond

Rick Morris just took my run at a joke!



Don

I miss NFL Network



Rick

First Round Dessert Update: Could not find Choco Tacos at the store, unlike last year, so right now it's Chocolate Truffle Gelato! #TheMoreYouKnow



Anthony

So when is the first "my baby’s getting paid?”



Raymond

Jadeven Clowney and Greg Robinson mark the second occasion within five drafts that players from the same conference have been selected first and second overall. Sam Bradford and Ndamukong Suh topped the 2010 NFL Draft for the Big Twelve conference.



Rick

Didn't we hear Clowney's mom yell that?

Anthony

I am on the computer. I missed it damn



Kyle

First interesting pick coming up here : Watkins or Mack?



Kyle

Whoa!



Christopher

Watkins for CLE! They better take him.



Rick

NEITHER! Blake Bortles at 3. #OMG



Paul

Grab Sammy and run.



Kyle Ross Watkins!



Jason

I'm with you, Galloway. Anything NFL, I defer to NFL Network. Mayock and Eisen pistol whip Kiper and McShay.



Raymond

Blake Bortles is the highest UCF Golden Knight selected within the history of the NFL Draft. The previous highest was another quarterback Daunte Culpepper in 1999.



Rick

Guys, I'm going for the patented Morris Reverse Jinx, it never fails. "These Cleveland Browns, of course they'll pass on Sammy Watkins, every draft is exactly the same with them!



Chris

Whoa!



Raymond

Woaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh TRADE???????



Kyle

Bills and Browns trade.



Rick

Uh, I guess even the Morris Reverse Jinx is not infallible.



Raymond

Well, we know there is no chance this is a quarterback!



Chris

Guessing Browns want Carr. Which pisses me off.



Raymond

Why would that upset you, Christopher Galloway? His brother worked out so well in Houston....



Raymond

Someone get to Rick Morris’ house and keep him from the sharp objects!



Rick

Excuse me for awhile, I need to grab my AK-47 and climb to the top of the Terminal Tower!



Paul

Unbelieveable.



Raymond

OMG I knew that was coming and damn it Rick this time there are witnesses.... I better see footage on Channels 3, 5, 8, and 19!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Rick

Well, 19 Action News is honest, fair and everywhere, right Kyle? #NotBloodyLikely



Jason

Well, there goes my hopes and dreams from this draft.



Raymond

Sammy Watkins is only the fifth Clemson player selected within the top ten of the NFL Draft and the first since Gaines Adams in 2004.



Chris

Hopefully, Evans is available at 9



Kyle

F 19! Reserving judgment on Browns. Maybe they get Evans.



Raymond

Jason, if it’s any consolation, they go much the way of your hopes and dreams from many many other drafts.



Paul

Stupidity.



Raymond

Ramona and Denise! Ramona and Denise! Ramona and Denise!



Raymond

Wait, why am I the only one chanting?



Rick

Chris, I'm in a separate chat with Paul and a few other friends and I just reacted to somebody saying that about Evans. I said that I think it's only 50-50 at best Evans is around at 9.



Raymond

I knew there would be a few moments more than worth the price of admission tonight.... Didnt know the first one would be less than forty minutes in!



Rick

I cannot honestly remember the last time I said this, one hell of a first-round pick by Oakland.



Raymond

Khalil Mack is only the second outside linebacker selected by the Oakland Raiders. The previous was Rob Frederickson of Michigan State in 1994.



Jeff

A Gaines Adams mention. Ughh. May he rest in peace, however.



Paul

Guy can play.



Raymond

Rob Frederickson was actually one of four linebackers selected in the first round of the 1994 Draft. The first was Kyle Ross’s favorite college football analyst Trev Alberts.



Jason

Not happy about that Mack pick.



Raymond

Jeff Briscoe has finally arrived... Quick, Rick, play that Sweet Georgia Brown-Roc Boys mashup we worked on!



Rick

Good to see you, Jeff. How much credence do you place in the Manziel-to-Tampa rumors? I would be very sympathetic to you if that happened, as I think it would be another case of a new regime trashing an inherited player. I think Glennon should get a chance.



Raymond

Agreed Rick, mostly because I want Johnny Football to go to Cleveland so you don’t have an excuse not to climb Terminal Tower!



Jeff

Yep. I'm nervous that the temptation to fill empty seats may lead to a Manziel pick by Tampa. On the bright side, maybe his buddy LeBron will hoist the pirate flag and sing Yo ho yo ho, it's a Bucs Life for me.



Raymond

LeBron doing something selfless.... NOT. A. CHANCE.



Jeff

Yeah, but the opportunity to sing 'Yo ho yo ho' might be appealing to him.



Jason

So, I'm pretty sure my mock is shot.



Raymond

Jake Matthews is the highest the Falcons have selected an offensive lineman since Atlanta chose Lincoln Kennedy eighth in 1993.

Don

I need a drink.



Raymond

Lincoln Kennedy was one of six offensive lineman chosen in the first round of the 1993 Draft. One of the other five was taken by the Browns. Anyone have a guess without Googling?



Rick

For people who don't believe in conspiracies, Smalls, a century ago there was an offensive lineman named Kennedy Lincoln! #WayTooObscureNerdJoke



Raymond

Jeff Briscoe, get Don a purple drank!



Rick Was that Steve Everett?



Jason

My draft party had to go on hold. Has anyone speculated on 9? It has to be Evans, Lewan, or Manziel, right?



Don

Evans.



Rick

I don't think Evans will be there, Don. I hope I'm wrong.



Jason

Believe it or not, I don't like Gordon/Evans anywhere near as much as I like Gordon/Watkins.



Raymond

Why am I the only one rooting for Johnny Football???? Rick can still edit our respective projects from Cuyahoga County Jail.....



Rick

From elsewhere on Facebook: "Evens [sic] for A&M will be a better WR than Watkins will ever be..."



Raymond

Rick Morris, whatever your dad is drinking, I would like a double... And when did he get Facebook?



Rick

Smalls, I'm sure my dad would be flattered that you think he could tell Watkins OR Evans from King Kong Bundy!



Jason

I'd rather them skip WR until 35 at this point. With Watkins off the board, I want Allen Robinson (in this minute).



Paul Pasek

There goes Evans.



Rick

Well, it won't be a WR at 9 now.



Jason

Good. I think we're building toward a medical condition for Rick, if 9 is what it feels like.



Chris

Moving up for Manziel, my guess.



Raymond

Mike Evans is the first Texas A&M Aggie selected by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers since defensive tackle Mark Wheeler in the third round of 1992.



Raymond

Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny!



Rick

Sweet mother of crap, it can no longer be denied what they're going to do. #ShootMeNow



Raymond

Rick Morris, I have a nine and thirty-two caliber C-Camp.... How traumatized do you want your father to be?



Chris Whoa!



Rick

Oh! I'm climbing off the ledge! A shutdown CB for the Browns!



Raymond

Rick don’t shoot anyone from Terminal Tower, just jump!



Jason

WHAT THE



Chris

I'm OK with this. They got a first next year too!



Raymond

Justin Gilbert is the highest an Oklahoma State cornerback has ever been selected. The previous high for a Pokes CB was R.W. McQuarters by the San Francisco 49ers in 1998.



Raymond

What in the name of people writing an authentic cheerleading film is going on?????



Jason

It’s the #1 CB on the board to play CB2. They scored on a top 'tandem' in the NFL. It was just CB, not WR. It’s good. It’s certainly better than trading down from 5 to get a center.



Rick

The only problem with a #1 next year is that the Browns have become the Reverse Bobby Beathard. Last year was about sacrificing for this year's draft. You have to stand and plant your flag and go for right now one of these years.



Jason

I still think if the 2nd QB doesn't come off the board by 11, they could fall. I like the value of WRs at 26 and beyond so much more than Evans, Beckham, etc.



Chris

Well, let's see what else they do, Rick, before passing judgment.



Chris

I think Farmer likes Mariota. That extra 1 is for him next year. My theory.



Jason

I was all but sure it was Johnny Football at 8, so who was everyone hoping it was going to be?



Raymond

A franchise plagued with quarterback issues takes an outside linebacker after a trade... That was as sound as Martin Scorsese directing Don’t Be A Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood!



Rick I'll bet that Barry Sanders is going to quit right in the middle of announcing Detroit's pick!



Jason

I think they are in love with Bridgewater



Don

Guys, I'm lost. Like seriously lost



Chris

Galloway Haha



Raymond

Anthony Barr is the first UCLA Bruin linebacker first round selection since Robert Thomas by the St. Louis Rams in 2002.



Jason

If they play this out right, it puts them in a position to move up next year and get a top flight prospect they otherwise shouldn't be in a position to get.



Chris

You could be right, Jason. He'll be there at 26. Probably at 35.



Kyle

Love that Lions pick!



Raymond

Eric Ebron is the second tight end the Lions have chosen in the first round in the past six years.



Rick

Are you down on Gilbert, Don? Pretty much consensus top CB and at a position of need.

Rick

I'm with you, Kyle. A probable top 3 or 4 TE in the league to go along with Megatron.



Jason

Here's the thing on Gilbert for the skeptics. He's taller than Haden, faster than Haden and a ball hawk. I don't see anything wrong with this pick other than Justin Gilbert's name is not Sammy Watkins.



Kyle

Lions could average 40 ppg



Paul

Manziel is this draft's Brady Quinn.



Kyle

Jason - I think I'm with you. Let's say they went WR and QB in round 1. Might not be a great CB at top of Rd 2. If they get Bridgewater at 26 and a WR at 35, that's good.



Rick

What, he's sitting with a Nicole Ritchie doppelganger golddigger?



Jason

(in a jingle singling voice) Oh, the QBs, they are uh-fallin.



Raymond Smalley Taylor Lewan is the first tackle the Tennessee Titans have selected in the first round since they were the Houston Oilers. Their pick then was Brad Hopkins of Illinois.



Jason

My dream scenario as of now (it changes with every pick) is Justin Gilbert, best QB available (and yes Johnny Football, if he's this year's Aaron Rodgers) and Allen Robinson or so.



Kyle

Lewan a good value at 11. But bad fit for Titans.



Raymond

Geaux Tigers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Raymond

Odell Beckham Jr. is only the second player from LSU that the New York Giants have ever selected. The other was also a wide receiver, Reuben Randle in 2012.



Raymond

I appreciate Rick Morris giving me the moment, as was done for Ned Jarrett as his little boy won his first of two Daytona 500s



Raymond

Incidentally, winning your second race of the season is much more important than winning the Daytona 500 #NextOnMoreThanAFan



Rick

Wow, and since your average reuben sammich has been more productive than Randle so far, it's pretty brave of them to return to the well!



Kyle

Hey Ricky. Chief Checkdown still blows. But my God, is Rams from four incredible.



Raymond

Aaron Donald is the first Pittsburgh defensive tackle selected in the first round since Sean Gilbert was the third overall choice of the 1992 NFL Draft. That third overall choice was made by the Los Angeles Rams.



Bob

Still think...unfortunately....the Browns will f up an existing good strategy and trade up to draft John Pigskin.



Raymond

Don’t worry Rick, you can still wear the Uncle Sam hat as you are methodically killing people from Term Tower tonight.



Raymond

Kyle Fuller is only the second cornerback selected by the Chicago Bears in first round history. The Bears previously made Mississippi State's Walt Harris the thirteenth overall pick of the 1996 NFL Draft.



Rick

If the Browns trade up for Manziel, I'm afraid that my Chocolate Truffle Gelato may end up digesting poorly. #TastefulEuphemism



Jason

At this point, Manziel is not a bad idea. May not be the idea some are excited about, but not a bad idea. I say if he's there at 26, take him, but don't trade up to get him.



Raymond

Walt Harris was one of twelve defensive players selected in the first round of the 1996 NFL Draft. One of them was Chelsea Lee Harris favorite linebacker and yours also, Rick Morris, Ray Lewis #LeaveYourLegacy



Chris

Manziel at 26 is fine. If it's a bust, you got a one for next year. If he's a boom, then it's Rodgers Part II.



Paul

Buckeye becomes a Steeler



Rick

If Rodgers was a midget with a questionable pro arm and questionable attitude, yeah.



Jason

Whose questionable arm/attitude?



Rick

Manziel.



Jason

Manziel has the strongest arm in this group. The attitude, sure, he's a diva.



Rick

I assume you're leaving Bortles out of that assessment.



Rick

And admittedly, arm is the LEAST of my many quibbles with Johnny Douche.



Raymond

Ryan Shazier is the eleventh Ohio State linebacker selected in the history of the first round. One of them was not Chris Spielman by the Detroit Lions. One of them was Craig Powell by the Cleveland Browns.



Jason

No, I'm not. Bortles does not have the strongest arm. It’s Manziel then Bortles/Bridgewater.



Rick

Jason, if I was going to be really unfair, I'd ask you if your confidence in Manziel's ability to read a pro defense is negatively affected by his resemblance to Dewey Crowe.



Jason

Here's my thing in a nutshell, if he becomes Drew Brees meets Colin Kaepernick, no one will care



Raymond

Zack Martin is the seventh Notre Dame player selected by the Dallas Cowboys and the highest in the franchise history. The Notre Dame of professional football's previous highest ND selection was Julius Jones in 2004.



Jason

Sure, I'll give you the reading defenses bit. In that regard, I lean toward Bridgewater.



Rick

Yes, because best-case-scenarios on draft gambles ALWAYS go the Browns' way! #TearingItUpSince99



Raymond

Anyone think Johnny in the NFL will be more like Roger Sterling meeting Zubi-Zubi-Zoo's parents at the American Cancer Society Dinner?



Raymond

Nice to see Alabama finally have a player selected, five players after the first from LSU.



Kyle

FWIW: My qb rankings. 1. Bridgewater. 2. Manziel. 3. Bortles.



Raymond

C.J. Mosley is the eleventh Alabama linebacker to be selected in first round history. The first was Lee Roy Jordan by the Dallas Cowboys in 1963.



Raymond

Kyle Ross, want to rethink those top two who are falling like a sh*t from heaven!



Jason

No. I don't have any issue with Kyles rankings at all. A draft day fall doesn't mean a darn* thing.



Kyle

Jason - Some excellent value still there for some of these good teams coming up. Can't believe Clinton Dix is still there.



Kyle

Packers will do cartwheels over Clinton Dix.



Raymond

Calvin Pryor is only the fourth Louisville Cardinal the New York Jets have selected in their history. The previous highest was Browning Nagle who was selected with the thirty-fourth overall selection in 1991, one pick south of Brett Favre.



Rick

Clinton Dix got him in trouble in office, Kyle. #HeyItsTopicalAgain



Raymond

It is unknown if Browning Nagle has ever worn or even owned a pair of crocs.

Kyle Ross Clinton Dix > Clinton Policy!



Jason

I don't know why, but I had a hunch he would fall a little. Still in the first but nowhere the 8-14 that seemed to be the consensus earlier



Paul

Ha Ha.



Rick

Yes, that's who we're talking about, Paul! #WhosOnFirst



Kyle

I was stunned Bears didn't grab him.



Rick

Jason, I thought it would be Pryor, but I told you I thought a top safety was gonna fall because teams might not prioritize it.



Raymond

HaHa Clinton-Dix is a fine example of all the young men produced by the University of Alabama who are clearly the result of too much Taco Casa Trey Oswalt Ashley Ortega #BeggingTOforaresponse



Paul

LOL HA HA.



Kyle

What in the Sam Hill do the Dolphins do here?



Scott

Freakin’ hilarious!



Scott

You can't hold a country boy down.



Rick

Go for that Samoan guard, Kyle, shades of High Chief Peter Maivia!



Raymond

Rick Morris, you owe me $17.50 and a slice of California Pizza Kitchen for that joke!



Rick

The good ones borrow, the great ones steal.



Raymond

And steal you did!



Rick

And like Peter Maivia's grandson, I am a Great One! #ItAllTiesTogetherInTheFDHLounge



Jason

Rick, now you're barking up my tree. If Manziel continues to fall, Bridgewater could be there at the end of the first, then insert the Seattle rumor. Grab Xavier Su'a-filo at 26 trade back in at 32.



Rick

Whoa! I'm a Tennessee honk and I'll be the first to say that my Fish reached.



Jason

Ja'Wuan James is a HUGE reach.



Kyle

I’d seen James mocked there.....but yeah, a reach.



Kyle

Based on need.



Kyle

HOLY CRAP....Browns get their choice at QB unless someone trades up

Kyle Ross Who are the Saints trading up for?



Rick

Kyle, the Dolphins didn't make my pick because Vince McMahon told Stephen Ross that the Samoan guy would only play barefoot.



Raymond

Ja'Wuan James is the first Tennessee tackle selected in the first round since Charles McRae and Antone Davis were taken with back to back selections in 1991.



Rick

It's not a big need for New Orleans, Kyle, but with Clinton-Dix falling, that's my first thought.



Raymond

Did anyone think Tennessee and Alabama would have the same number of first round picks tonight?



Chris

Dix or Dennard.



Kyle

Saints have one of best starting safeties in league now: Byrd and Vaccaro.



Jason

I had James pegged as a guy that potentially could have been there as a RT candidate at the top of the third.



Rick

That's my thought as well, Kyle. I think Chris is right, Dennard is the other guy falling farther than he should.



Jason

Brandin Cooks.



Jason

This has to be offense.



Raymond

Kyle Ross saying Browns will have their choice at QB... Am I the only one thinking that could be a jinx... Quick Rick Morris, say something stupid bahahahaha.



Rick

And that's true as well, Kyle.

2 secs · Like

Kyle Ross Good call J



Rick

KYLE AND JASON NAIL IT!



Kyle

Packers should run to podium to take Clinton Dix!



Chris

Good call. Knowing Philly wanted him...



Rick

Oh boy. That could be a move to make Green Bay plausible enough on D to put them in there with Seattle and San Fran.



Kyle

Someone could trade into KC's spot to take a QB.



Mike

KC could take a QB; Smith did not sign a extension.



Raymond

Brandin Crooks is the seventh Oregon State Beaver selected by the New Orleans Saints. The previous highest was linebacker James Allen in the third round of the 2002 NFL Draft.



Kyle

True, Ptak.



Rick

Michael Ptak in the house! Yes, KC could do that, because Smith is just a Band-Aid anyway.



Chris

GB go Dix?



Rick

Boy, I think they have to. He's another "ripple effect" defensive player and that's a unit that still needs help.



Raymond

If Johnny Football slides to the Browns can we get Donald Don P Peterson back to do a hip hop cover of Midnight At The Oasis?



Rick

Most of the other standouts I thought GB would have to choose from are gone, but conversely, I never thought HHCD would be there. They're lucky to have the shot at him.



Rick

Smooth move, Packers. You won't regret this.



Don

I have Johnny Football bars ready to go, Raymond Smalley, all they have to do is draft him.



Kyle

I really like that pick....Didn't move up. Got a player that should have gone earlier. Filled a major need.



Chris

Could Cinci go QB?



Kyle

I’ve thought that....but Bengals will probably look CB - Roby or Dennard.



Rick

It's possible, but they'd be courting a lot of messiness at this stage of the game if they did.



Raymond

Ha'Sean (HaHa) Clinton-Dix is the first defensive back chosen by the Green Bay Packers in the first round since the green and gold selected Antuan Edwards of Clemson in 1999.



Kyle

Make no mistake about it.....Bengals SHOULD go Bridgewater.....Dump Dalton.. Loser.



Bedford Crenshaw

I hope you're right Kyle, as I'm a Louisville fan and a Bengals fan.



Bob

Shazier, Mosely- Smart Pics....(go Bucks).



Rick

That would be killing two birds with one stone, Bedford, but I don't see it. That leaves Bridgewater for my Browns, though!



Raymond

Yes, but it also leaves Johnny Football.



Jason

Why is Mosley included in a "go Bucks" comment?



Raymond

Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny! Johnny!



Kyle

Browns just traded up.....it’s QB.



Rick

Scratching my head also, Jason. Bob?



Kyle

Teddy! Teddy! Teddy!



Jason

Someone's going to be really happy or really not.



Paul

Browns move up.



Raymond

Kyle Ross, this is now a lot like that scene in Rachel Getting Married where they chanted the bride and groom's names. lol



Rick

I'm about to do a flying elbowsmash onto a random red couch if this goes my way.



Raymond

Or you are climbing a certain Cleveland landmark... Let’s find out which?



Chris

Which QB? Gotta be Bridgewater.



Rick

MOTHERFU----



Chris Oh my God.



Bedford Crenshaw

Whew, Teddy got saved.



Raymond

Johnny Cleveland Brown!!!!! Hell Yeah!



Jason

Can someone get Suicide Watch over to the Morris residence?



Raymond

Rick Morris, if you don’t think I am calling you to mock in about an hour, you dont know me at all!



Raymond

Let’s make it official.  Johnny Manziel is the sixth quarterback the Cleveland Browns have selected in first round history.



Rick

Yeah, most of the rest have gone swimmingly, haven't they? #FML



Rick

Although my boy Ron Glasenapp just reminded me, we do own this bust in a fantasy keeper league. LOLZ



Raymond

He is the third quarterback the Browns have selected from the SEC, joining Tim Couch and Eric Zeier.



Raymond

Johnny Angel, how I love him and I hope that someday you love him, too!



Raymond

For a signed copy of Jason Jones Mock Draft, can anyone name the other five quarterbacks the Browns have chosen in the first round?



Anthony

It’s funny how I saw an interview with Roethlisberger where he said Joey Porter was rooting for the Browns to draft Manziel cuz he can handle that.



Raymond

Kevin Seifert on ESPN after the pick: Manziel does not look thrilled.



Raymond

He doesn’t have to... I am for him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Rick

So according to Sal Pal, Jimmy Haslem takes draft advice from a homeless man. Makes more sense than anything else I can see.



Jason

35 has to be a WR. Or Bucannon or Borland.



Jason

Or Su'a-Filo, if hes still there.



Chris

Maybe browns slide back into Round 1 and get Lee.



Rick

Gosh, I can't wait for the first time that Manziel misses all five reads and pulls the ball down for a risky run like he did in the Peach Bowl. #PoorMansVinceYoung



Jason

Don't crucify me, but I don’t want Lee.



Raymond

My God, they've killed him! They have killed him! As God as my witness, Rick Morris’s spirit has been broken in half!



Chris

Rick I don't disagree with you, but at 22 and getting a first next year I can live with the gamble.  I woulda been pissed at 4.



Rick

Yeah, but nobody will ever convince me it was a good move to pass on Bridgewater for this project.



Raymond

Dee Ford is the tenth Auburn Tiger the Kansas City Chiefs have selected in their history. The only one of those in the first round before tonight was offensive tackle Victor Riley in 1998.



Rick Morris At least Manziel can use his athleticism to (eventually) take his place on special teams.



Raymond

Hold on I just received a text from Johnny Manziel and it reads.... "Pu-Pu-Puh-Project??????????????"



Rick

Hey, Josh Cribbs was a college QB also. Maybe Manziel can be a special teams stopper and gadget 4th WR. #NotFeelingMuchBetter



Chris

I liked Bridgewater more, too. But I agree JF could be much, much more. It's a gamble. I still want to go QB later in draft.



Bedford Crenshaw

*sigh* Oh well.



Chris

Damn, the Bengals just keep getting deeper.



Rick

Well, to paraphrase Bobby Knight, "If your team's going to draft Bizarro World Tim Tebow," you might as well relax and enjoy it.



Rick

Bedford, he's a tremendous talent at an area of need and you weren't taking Bridgewater anyway.



Bedford Crenshaw

Thanks for the tip.



Raymond

Darqueze Denard is only the second Michigan State cornerback selected in the history of the NFL Draft. The previous was Renaldo Hill by the Arizona Cardinals in 2001.



Kyle

Good pick by Cincy.



Raymond

I saw Ricky crying in his beer at Smokey John's Cafe!



Rick

Oy. I am regurgitating my Chocolate Truffle Gelato. Tasted much better going down.



Chris

Conversation tomorrow will be: will LeBron come back to CLE to be with his buddy Johnny Football? Hahaha.



Raymond

Waaaaaaaa-haaaaa at Smokey Johnnnnnnn's Cafeeeeeeeeeee!



Jason

I just said to my friend, "There is no way on the planet, Cinci passed on Dennard."



Raymond

This is the greatest moment in the history of ever!



Rick

Tony Schiavone has a random Nitro in August 2000 and begs to differ.



Rick

Johnny Football is destined to be the best Browns Heisman Trophy winner since Charles White!



Raymond

I'm Rick Morris for Kyle Ross and Jason Jones: Jimmy Haslam you can go to hell!



Rick

THIS IS MY BASH AT THE BEACH '96 MOMENT!



Raymond

Jason Verrett is only the fourth cornerback selected within the history of the NFL Draft. The previous highest was Drew Coleman in the sixth round of the 2006.



Kyle

Eagles taking Lee?



Raymond

Marcus Smith is only the fifth Louisville Cardinal selected by the Philadelphia Eagles and the first since defensive end Mike Flores in the eleventh round of 1991.



Jason

Marcus Smith is a reach, but he's been impressive in the post-season



Rick

Eagles should've taken Lee, Kyle.



Raymond

How do you have the time to be as thorough as you are, know as much as you do and write one incredible pilot that I am certain you will follow with another on your next project?



Rick

That question could be aimed at a few of us, but I'll intercept. I manage!



Raymond

And you do a damn fine job which I will remember when I think about the fact #PaperTigers is on its twentieth month bahahaha.



Raymond

BREAKING: Dont know how I missed this... Don has some Johnny Football bars already scribbled.



Raymond

The band is getting tuned’ up!



Don

Wrote ‘em weeks ago.



Raymond

I love it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Jason

The short answer is that I watch college football prospects, not college football teams. The draft is also my Super Bowl.



Jason

Arians should grab Bridgewater here!



Jason

HHUUUUUUUUGGGGEEEE Reach. But mostly because I wanted him badly



Chris

In the greatest drama ever, Browns will take Bridgewater at 35. Haha.



Rick

If only!



Chris

I would be thrilled. Per our previous conversations, Rick.



Rick

I'd be wary if I was Panther Fan. They've had a buttload of WRs who can't separate over the years, could be one more.



Raymond

Deone Bucanon is the fourth Washington State defensive back selected in the first round. The others were Marcus Trufant, Ken Greene, and Clancy Williams.



Raymond

Kelvin Benjamin is only the second wide receiver selected by the Carolina Panthers in their franchise history. The first was Rae Carruth in 1997.



Jason C. Jones I've had Kelvin Benjamin going to CAR since the confetti fell.



Raymond

Rick Morris When you climb Terminal Tower tonight Rick, do not meet with his fate... Please wear a ski mask of some kind!



Kyle

I thought Steelers reached for Shazier.



Kyle Ross Such a Belichick pick!



Raymond

Dominique Easley is the first defensive tackle selected in the first round by New England since they spent twenty-first overall pick of 2004 on Miami-Florida's Vince Wilfork.



Scott

I'm really enjoying my Facebook and Twitter feeds going absolutely batshiznit either for or against Johnny Football Crowe.



Jason

Damn! I really wanted Deone Bucannon



Raymond

Jason, Said No One Ever lmao.



Jason

Shazier was a reach.



Rick

Scott, I really need to get to work on creating Johnny Football Crowe memes, get 'em to go viral.



Jason

About what?



Rick

Bucannon.



Raymond

Uhhhh ohhH Rick is about to go into the zone.... Its five-knuckle shuffle time!!!



Jason

Bucannon is nice. I can't imagine anyone looking at the whole field (beyond the first round or first 50 picks) had to feel the same way.



Jason

Well Rick, "weknowmemes.com" makes it really easy.



Raymond

Jimmie Ward is only the second Northern Illinois defensive back to ever be selected. The first was Clarence Vaughn in the eighth round of 1987.



Raymond

1987 is a year Cleveland Browns fans should remember as their beloved team selected with the fifth overall pick linebacker Mike Junkin.



Jason

The safety "cupboard" is about to be BARE



Rick

And Clarence Vaughn's cousin's boyfriend's ex-wife once cut Jimmie Ward's hair! #NotReallyButEquallyRelevant



Raymond

It is ironic for two reasons.... Duke, where Mike Junkin played is the opponent Johnny Manziel defeated in his final collegiate football game and on that day the Browns selected the Mad Dog in the Meat Locker and Rick Morris felt roughly how he feels this evening.



Rick

Wow, Jason, you better hope you're getting "What He Could Be Bradley Roby" instead of "What He Has Been So Far Bradley Roby."



Chris

Roby. Blech.



Jason

Yep. I deferred to you on that one early until I could go back and watch again. The good news is he will be at most the CB2, and when Harris comes back they could move him to nickel until he figures it out. Physically, he's what you want. He's just gotta get better.



Raymond

Bradley Roby is the first first-round cornerback selected by the Denver Broncos since Willie Middlebrooks of Minnesota in 2001.



Raymond

Well, we all assume unless a deal is struck that this is not quarterback so Teddy lives until tomorrow.



Jason

In Denver, I'll take it. I would've preferred Jason Varrett.



Raymond

I would have preffered Marty Barrett.....



Rick

Instead of a corner with less physicality than Brad Garrett ...



Raymond

Has anyone else had as much fun as me tonight?



Rick

Clearly, that is a rhetorical question!



Jason

Trade....



Jason

TEDDY BRIDGEWATER



Raymond

But Rick, he can likely sing much better than Jeff Jarrett



Raymond

Yeah, no doubt!!!!!!!!!!!!



Rick

Even if he can't swoop down in coverage as well as your average ferret.



Rick

Hey, The Scout never came back after his shower. Should we be alarmed? #TooMuchFunWithTheLoofah



Jason

C'mon Teddy B.



Raymond

Teddy Bridgewater is the twenty-first quarterback selected in Minnesota Vikings draft history and the fourth in the first round. The previous three were Christian Ponder, Daunte Culpepper, and Tommy Kramer.



Jason

Yeah!!!



Rick

"BUT BUT BUT he had a bad pro day!" -- average mouthbreather



Raymond

Bonus Fact: Teddy Bridgewater is the ninth Louisville quarterback selected in NFL Draft history. The first was Johnny "Football" Unitas in 1955.



Jason

Damn the Pro Day. Damn the Combine. Teddy is nice. This is a steal. He wins that job halfway through camp.



Chris

So what's CLE do tomorrow?



Raymond

Had so much fun as always and I leave you all with these five words Johnny Football and Good Night!



Jason

Xavier Su'a-filo OG. Allen Robinson or Cody Latimer WR. Morgan Moses OT, Borland ILB, Carlos Hyde RB.



Rick

I think WR or OL, Chris.



Jason

I will put together a "best of who's left" and post it before I go to bed.



Rick

I don't know if everyone can make it again, but what we had here clearly demonstrates the need for some Day 2 action!



Jason

I will be there excited and ready to roll.



Jason

Safety is bare. There's still a few starters at OT. Best OG and C are still there. Tons TONS of WRs left. Derrek Carr is still out there. All of the RBs. Three good TEs. DT and a few DEs. There is more than enough to be excited about for Day 2. Great potential for Round 2 and 3.



Kyle

I f’ing love the NFC north in 2014!!



Chris

I'd like OG.



Jason

A week ago, I was all for Xavier Su'a-filo at 26. He’s that good. They pick him he's a starter 10 seconds after the pick.



Chris

Be great to add depth on O-line and get WR with the following pick.



Jason

Problem is, I want Xavier Su'a-filo and Allen Robinson equally badly.



Rick

Honestly, I'd package other picks to make sure we can do that. Quality of our picks right now is way more important than quantity.



Kyle

Jason - if he's gone, do you go WR?



Jason

Su'a-filo?



Jason

If we only have the 35th and don't trade up (I agree with Rick here, if you can turn 10 picks across the draft to 5 picks in the first 50-75, that would be better) then yes. I'd go WR. I know it’s deep. But whether we're talking immediate impact or long-term impact there is a difference between Lee/Robinson/Latimer and everyone else.



Kyle

By Gawd, Houston can’t take another Carr, can they?



Jason

Oh yes they can. He's is the better Carr. I'm sure the fans will feel uneasy about it, but they should. He's the last guy that looks like a real and sooner rather than later impactful starter. Garopollo, McCaron, Savage maybe? But Carr should be the guy.



Chris

They won't. Image. Pure and simple.



Rick

Hey Jason, does Ryan Leaf have a younger brother that San Diego can draft? C'mon now!


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