Sunday, June 29, 2008

Remember when Olbermann faked modesty?

By Rick Morris

Keith Olbermann has shown himself to be enough of an out-of-his-depth political lightweight that even those who share his fever-swamp hatreds like Glenn Greenwald are taking him apart on a regular basis. As he degenerates further and further into his irrelevant world of obsessive grudge-furthering and political lie-circulating, it occurred to me that KO had previously tried to rehabilitate his reputation with an allegedly heartfelt mea culpa for being an idiot. Given my mad Google-fu skills, I uncovered his sniveling Uriah Heep routine in no time. Compare and contrast the words you see here and here with the remorseless, deranged rantings chronicled on a daily basis at OlbermannWatch.

Here's some of the better passages:

"This isn't even about specific events or people, although nearly everybody at ESPN merits an apology from me, and I give it willingly and with great sadness, but with some hope that it will explain if not erase my actions, and might even be of some inspiration to any who might be afflicted in the same curious way I've come to learn I am.

This is about not knowing why you do things -- literally, not knowing for years and years -- and then suddenly beginning to scratch the surface of understanding. That earlier imagery about the gauzy haze is almost factually precise: It feels as if I've been coming out of a huge fog bank." QUESTION: When did you get re-immersed?

"But whatever any of them said about 'insecurity' or 'perfectionism,' I know I just took it as an attack and stiffened my extra-long spine." Wow, Keith, you seem so much better-adjusted these days. Of course, my sarcasm at the expense of "The Great One" probably just got me nominated for "Worst Person in the World."

"
The oddest thing about all this, is that even when I left -- and in six weeks I will have been gone longer than I was there -- executives like Walsh and Howard Katz underscored that I was welcome to return at some distant future date, despite all the Sturm und Drang. And, man, I was usually producing both the Sturm and the Drang." Keith, do you forget what you've written previously, or do you just have no capacity for self-awareness?

"
Referring to ESPN's executives, I told Freeman that 'other than Steve Anderson, I don't think any of them are any good.' Well, that was ridiculous then and it is ridiculous now. Without even judging how good they were, just to keep a monolith like ESPN on the air every day requires as many good executives as they have at NORAD." OK, who are you going to admit you were lying about a few years from now? Are O'Reilly and Murdoch really good guys who you're just perpetrating show-biz feuds with for the sake of ratings and dollars?

"
I now read with horror of my ESPN2 co-host, Ms. Kolber, sequestering herself in the women's bathroom and weeping over how I treated her. She told Freeman that as things deteriorated, I wouldn't talk to her. She's wrong: I couldn't talk to her. I pumped up some small-scale complaints into a scenario in which she was at fault for everything ESPN2 hadn't become. I wasn't completely obtuse back then, and if anything would have cut through my neuroses, it would've been a colleague's tears. If I had known, I think I could've jumped over the fence I'd built around myself and said what the inner guy always knew: No TV show is worth crying over. Suzy: I'm sorry." And how many MSNBC employees cry in restrooms right now as a result of your bullying personality, Keith?

"So, I'm sorry. It should have been done differently. It wasn't. Then again, I'm only finding out now about that extra vertebra and the extra steps I have to take to learn how to be, well, flexible." If any MSNBC employee wants to leave any of Keith's old words for him on a note left on his desktop, there's a crisp shiny fin in it for you!

3 comments:

sportstalkNETWORK.com said...

Spoken like a true conservative. Your hatchet job is not surprising at all.

It is a pity you are too daft to recognize the brilliance and wit of Keith Olbermann, yo.

*cough*

Rick Morris said...

Olbermann is wack, yo.

--Rick

sportstalkNETWORK.com said...

Indeed.