Sunday, March 23, 2008

FDH Lounge News Nuggets

By Rick Morris

Our "News Nuggets" segment on our FDH LOUNGE program generally addresses minor topics, or sometimes wacky ones, in detail that is brief relative to our discussion of other matters. This "News Nuggets" column is going to be a bit different, as factors relating to the overall FDH family (primarily keeping our pimp hand strong during fantasy baseball season) have kept me from opining here as much as I would have liked over the past two weeks -- but I do want to put my two cents in on the following topics:

^ Eliot Spitzer -- what goes around ... ew, I'm not going to finish that sentence given some of the connotations some people could put there! But this jerkwad slimed Richard Grasso and others on Wall Street, preferring to hypocritically try to blackmail them using their alleged sexual misadventures as part of his grandstanding campaign to advance himself. Now I'm supposed to feel sorry for him now that he's got a "problem"? Nah. I do feel badly for his daughters and yes, for his wife, notwithstanding her decision to accompany him in front of the cameras instead of walking away like he deserved (BTW, may I say Mrs. Spit is looking fine for her age and I'm sure there'd be a long line of guys looking to cheer up this "Mrs. Robinson" if push comes to shove). Now he suffers more humiliation as we learn that he likes to keep his black socks on, uh, "during." Wow. Pardon me while I get some turpentine and try to scrub my brain of that mental image ... OK, I'm back now with one more note. Apparently Hollywood Wackjob Par Excellence Alec Baldwin worshiped this guy and thinks America's going in the crapper now that he's been marginalized. He also notes that prostitution is wrong because "every prostitute is someone's daughter." I'm actually touched that Baldwin took five minutes out of his busy schedule (which, ironically, seems to consist largely of working towards driving his own young daughter to a career "on the pole" by screaming at her about her alleged bovine tendencies) to break off that particular bit of Captain Obvious wisdom.

^ Planned Parenthood's real agenda is snuffing out black babies. The heck you say! The same folks who revere their founder, Fascist Racist Extraordinare Margaret Sanger? Evidently, things haven't changed much since Sanger was founding their little baby-skull-crushing enterprise:

"Margaret Sanger spoke of sterilizing those she designated as 'unfit,' a plan she said would be the 'salvation of American civilization.' And she also spike of those who were 'irresponsible and reckless,' among whom she included those " whose religious scruples prevent their exercising control over their numbers." She further contended that 'there is no doubt in the minds of all thinking people that the procreation of this group should be stopped.' That many Americans of African origin constituted a segment of Sanger considered 'unfit' cannot be easily refuted.

She wrote: 'We do not want the word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population, and the minister is the man who can straighten that idea out if it ever occurs to any of their more rebellious members.'"

Whoopsie Margaret! All these years later one of your peons let the cat out of the bag about your extermination agenda. Sucks when that happens, eh?

"Donor: Wonderful. I want to specify that abortion to help a minority group - would that be possible?

Kersey (Planned Parenthood employee!!!): Absolutely.

Donor: Like the black community for example?

Kersey: Certainly.

Donor: OK, so the abortion -- I can give money specifically for a black baby, that would be the purpose.

Kersey: Absolutely. If you wanted to designate that you wanted your gift to be used to help (an) African-American woman in need, then we would certainly make sure that that gift was earmarked specifically for that purpose.

Donor: Great. Because I really face trouble with affirmative action, and I don't want my kids being disadvantaged, you know, against black kids. I just had a baby; I want to put it in his name, you know.

Kersey: Mmhmm, absolutely.

Donor: So that's definitely possible.

Kersey: Oh, always, always.

Donor: So I just wanna - can I put this in the name of my son?

Kersey: Absolutely.

Donor: Yeah, he's trying to get into colleges, and he's going to be applying, you know, he's just -- we're just really big -- he's really faced troubles with affirmative action.

Kersey: Mmhmm.

Donor: And we don't, you know, we just think, you know, the less black kids out there the better.

Kersey: (Laughs) Understandable, understandable. ... Um David, let me, if I may, just get some sort of specific general information so we can set this up the right way. You said you wanted to put it in your son's name, and you would like this designated specifically to assist (an) African-American woman who's looking to terminate a pregnancy.

Donor: Exactly, and yeah, I wanna protect my son, so he can get into college.

Kersey: All right. Excuse my hesitation, um, um, this is the first time I've had a donor call and make this kind of request, so I'm excited, and I wanna make sure I don't leave anything out."

Well, at least the media's been pretty quiet about it, ensuring that the populace remains in the dark about what a holocaust that "choice" really is.

^ The NCAA is officially more cynical than any politician anywhere. We see now what CBS gets for its 58 gajillion dollars for the NCAA hoops tournament. Mayo v. Beasley in Round One of the brackets? Bob Huggins facing his ancient rival Xavier for a shot at the Elite Eight? Georgetown happening to draw the little sister just up the road for the first round sacrificial lamb? A first round battle of very different sentimental favorites in Notre Dame and George Mason? This entire event is tainted by the fact that it is explicitly made-for-TV in the sense that logical matchups and fair seeding are going to be cast aside for whatever the puppets on the committee think is going to move the Nielson ratings. Say what you will about Vince McMahon, and I've buried him consistently, but at least he's honest about what his enterprise is.

^ Speaking of the tournament, Bobby Knight has yet to choke Digger Phelps out on camera. Fortunately, we've got two weeks to go ...

^ Winners win and losers make excuses. The Detroit Tigers have, predictably, signed their new young franchise player Miguel Cabrera to a megabucks deal that will keep him in town well into the next decade. Meanwhile, my Cleveland Indians are engaging in a season-long goodbye wave to C.C. Sabathia. And people wonder why I may sound bitter from time to time ...

^ So now Hugh Hewitt is pushing Mitt Romney for V.P. Who saw that coming? I'd watch my back if I was McCain, though, because if that ticket wins in November, good old Uncle Hughey is going to be perched in the crow's nest on Inauguration Day with a poison blowdart aimed right at JM's carotid artery.

^ Speaking of poison blowdarts, I wouldn't put my "thoat" anywhere within firing distance of Hillary these days if I was Bill Richardson. What a greasy, back-stabbing opportunist -- and surprise, he doesn't side with the Clintons!

^ Obama's pastor hates Whitey. Obama himself throws his grandma under the bus to make him look better by comparison. Whoever said campaigns teach us nothing about the candidates for office?

^ So now Steven Spielberg, Nancy Pelosi and other moral posturers are doing their full-blown "Mr. Mackey routine" at China: "Mmmmkay, genocide is bad, mmmmmkay?" Call me cynical if you must, but I can't see any of these buffoons standing up to an Islamic terrorist threatening our country in the same way -- or standing up for the rights of (those darn intolerant and judgmental!) Christians in the same way. But now that China is oppressing Buddhists -- conjuring up the image of helpless, peaceful fat bald guys rubbing their bellies as ChiCom tanks plow them over -- well, hey, now it's time to take a stand! Gimme a call the next time any of these assclowns raises a peep when a Jewish woman and her family gets blown to bits by a homicide bomber in Israel ...

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